Finalized more than 1 month ago the MasterClass - Training with Kim Scott about Tackle the Hard Conversations with Radical Candor® (trailer below).
The more than 3 hours of content was a great investment and I have learnt a lot in an area that I definitely needed to improve my game.
I can only say that I really enjoyed the Sessions and made me think differently on how to tackle conversations throughout my personal and professional life (hard or soft), by following the 4 pillars of the Radical Candor framework:
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Get feedback,
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Give praise,
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Give criticism,
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Gauge on how the feedback has landed.
and while doing it, to be cognizant that the most important is not what you say, but what the receiving part understands.
What is Radical Candor?
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Care personally → while engaging with others show how you care about their wellbeing/feelings as a person,
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Challenge directly → tell the good and the bad directly, do not overvalue the short-term feelings, but think about the long-term prospects.
A imagine can speak 1.000 words, thus the below framework will do just that:
This framework should be used to guide better discussions/conversations with others.
The “Care Personally” dimension, aka “Give a Damn” dimension, makes us embrace the emotions embedded in every interaction, avoid a “friend vs. foe” mindset and allows us to disclose common human decency when dealing with others.
The “Challenge Directly” dimension oblige you to say what you think when things are not going well or to say something when they are and avoid the default mindset “if I cannot say something positive, I would not say a thing”.
You should not forget that providing Radical Candor is always about what you think and is not communicating a truth/fact of life. Why? Candor implies a dialogue, and you are not fully certain of your feedback and willing to receive counterarguments, while a truth is a one-way communicating path.
The key on how to approach Radical Candor it is not to make the other person feel good, but what would be good for them.
(WHY) One should not forget that is part of your job as manager to provide critical feedback, praise and also solicit feedback. Full Stop.
(HOW) In order to do the above you should:
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Get feedback,
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Give praise & criticism
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Gauge it - understand how it has landed
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Encourage it within your team.
(WHEN) if possible, it should be immediate, and one should not wait for a better moment, thus do not wait for your 1-2-1 or PDP, but you need to ensure that everyone, including yourself, is in the right mood/mindset and it should be quick and not something too lengthily.
Double-clicking on the 4 steps mentioned on the how, my key takeaways were:
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Ask and Receive feedback
Why we need it:
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Understand what we are doing that is contributing to such behavior and good/poor performance,
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Understand the context,
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Provide psychological safety to the other person to speak its mind.
How to do-it:
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Think the questions you will make to induce that feedback - (Start, Stop, Continue doing),
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Make it natural and authentic,
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Be aware on how your words are landing,
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Do not fish for compliment,
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Make open-ended questions, but within a context or situation you want to approach.
Remember that the goal is to detect if you are doing something wrong and how you can improve and actively listen to the feedback.
While listening embrace the discomfort, you should not be defensive and make follow-up questions.
Finally, you should reward candor. How?:
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if you agree with the feedback, fix the problem immediately,
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if you agree but it’s difficult to solve it quickly, acknowledge it and ask help to fix it,
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if you disagree you should, with respect, explain why you disagree.
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Offer powerful praise
While praising you should:
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focus on what went well,
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show that you care and,
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challenge that person to do more of that
The key features of a good praise have the following ingredients:
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Should be helpful (humble),
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Immediate and in person,
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Public and not about personality but actions,
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Context - you should provide a clear context,
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Observation - pinpoint the specific action(s) that you are referring to,
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Results - Provide the effect of such action,
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Next steps - promote that it happens again.
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Give Criticism Effectively
The key features of effective criticism are exactly the same as #2, with the exception that it should be made privately.
One should offer criticism for things that really matter and are important to the receiver of the critique.
When that critique lands badly and too personal, try to focus the conversation on the behavior and not the person.
Try to start a dialogue to promote corrections and for that one should:
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not try to find winners or losers, but find a solution,
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bring data to support the discussion,
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try to understand the other side POV.
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Gauge how your feedback lands
Don’t forget it is a conversation, not a dialogue, understand how the other person is responding to what you are saying.
More often than not, such talks go better than you anticipated, but when your feedback is not being received as you wanted to, what can you do?
If they seem sad:
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should avoid relaxing the challenge directly quadrant of your message, but you should step-up the care personally quadrant.
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stay present and offer comfort,
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ensure that you understand the emotion being shared,
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see what is needed in that moment by the other person.
If they seem mad:
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get curious not furious - be self-aware if the latter happens to control it,
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go up a notch on the care personally axis,
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try to think how you could have said it differently in order not to trigger that kind of reaction.
If they are not listening:
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step-up on the challenge directly axis,
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use multiple examples to draw attention,
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ask for feedback on what you have said and what has been understood.
We should understand how hard to push, but we also need to know when we need to part way and you should promote a “Radical Candor” culture within your organization and/or teams.
As a conclusion, I do feel that I gained a lot by investing my time on this training and hopefully I will be able to use most of the insights and new knowledge in my day-2-day work, although for that it will require persistence and consistent practice.
Happy to discuss further about this subject with all that have interest in this topic.
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